Holidays

I think when you go out looking for someone it always ends up in a disaster. Trying to be patient but this being single thing is getting old.  I don't think it's to much to ask to find someone who I can be happy with. At the end of the day everyone wants someone to be there. Everyone wants someone to share their hopes and dreams with. I just can't seem to find someone who really cares. I don't know if I am just looking in the wrong places or what. Everyone I know is basically in a relationship so it makes me feel even worse. Wasting your life on someone for three years who didn't even consider you his girlfriend is really a wakeup call. I will not settle just as I've been told by someone else that they will not 
settle. I guess maybe in their eyes I am not good enough for them? Superficial world we live in where way to many people care what other other people are going to think. Not me. I am the one who can see a person's heart so other's opinions should not matter at all. At this point in my life I am not even sure what love really is, It defiantly isn't what I thought it was. I suppose there is a difference in loving someone and being in love. I just don't think with all that's happened I could really even tell if someone really loved me. I sure as heck wouldn't know how to react.

There will always be critics I know ... People who want to see you fail and who do not believe in you. Those are the people that I strive most of all to prove wrong and because of them I try even more. i always believed I was a really driven person. I just never could figure out to get where I wanted, I see that changing everyday. There is a way if you really want something and if you try hard enough success is possible. I have just always let my emotions and my heart get in the way and hold  me back. Time to make everything I want happen.